Archive for the 'Drunken Boozen Stories' Category

“The Sprinker” Drunken Boozen Story!

Thursday, January 4th, 2007

Steve is this guy I lived with, I asked him what he did this weekend. He replied; I can’t go to Aqua. I asked him why? Steve tells me he did the “sprinkler,” funniest shit ever; right on the dance floor. New Boozen definition. SPRINKLER….. “To piss in spirts on a dance floor.” not a very wise move, Boozen estimates the following occurrences could happen.

1. Drunk in public.

2. Exposing yourself in public.

3. Get beat up by large man, you just pissed on.

4. Get slapped by the girl you came with.

5. Go home with some lady who enjoys urination.

6. Bouncers come throw you out and you go home alone.

All are not good.

So Boozen highly recommends that Steve and any future Pissers keep it in your pants until you reach a restroom or secluded part of the parking lot.

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Theory of Flip Cup One Day Improving Our Economy.

Friday, October 6th, 2006

Theory by:  Kevin during hangover. 

So I was discussing popular drinking games with a few gentlemen from my fine university. We discussed the challenges of beer pong. The strategies involved in asshole, and the subject of Flip cup. The Question arose, why people don’t play flip cup in bars. I answered simply because everyone is a winner, “They all get shit faced.” Well Kevin replied “I believe if they started flip cup in bars it could boost our economy.” You probably are asking How So. He explained that if people drink that much they will ultimately crash their car or get a ticket or both. Thus, fines will increase, new cars will be sold, and our economy will flourish.

Boozen salutes you;  hungover college students who advise massive drinking in schemes to better our economy. May you lead future bars to promote such games as flip cup?

 

 

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